Archive for June 16th, 2008

How committed are you to remaining in this lifestyle?

Over the weekend I received an email from an ex-slave of mine. She is now living in the Southwest while being involved in a vanilla relationship. Her departure from the lifestyle got me thinking about how many actually remain commitment to the choice they make.

My personal experience is that I spent years going in and out of this way of life. After being first introduced to it a decade ago, I entered into a couple of traditional relationships. Each time ended in me being completely unhappy. Having found what was true to myself, I found that living any other way of life was not feasible.

Online, I see many who are searching. At the same time, I also witness a number of people who get into “relationships”. Of all that get involved, I wonder how many remain true to their decision. My presumption is that many leave after the first relationship fails. They are “testing the waters” so to speak. For some, the decision to enter this lifestyle was misguided. Some simply are not designed for this. However, there are many who are yet seem to exit.

For me, I need to remember to remain true to myself. This is the way of life which seems to work best for me. All my vanilla relationships ended tragically (not in death but almost). Yet there is great pressure from society to live a different way. Many find this to be distasteful and an abusive way to live. The ignorance that exists is enormous. Nevertheless, it is how I choose to live my life. It is also how I believe I was designed to live. Remaining true to that decision is of paramount importance to me.

Will my friend ever re-enter this way of life? There is no way to tell. However, in our time together she showed herself to be a wonderful slave. It is tragic that the lifestyle lost someone who was so enthusiastic. Nevertheless, her fears (in my view) pushed her to get into something that is different from her core. This was the same motivation which led me back to the traditional relationships.

My only suggestion is to remain patient. The right person will come along if we are committed to our decision. Many seem to feel that he or she needs to grab onto someone as opposed to being alone. This is how people justify settling for less than they truly are. Caring forward in a committed manner is what enables O/one to find happiness in the M/s world.

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Children are known to want what other children are given. This is magnified when those children are siblings. It is interesting to witness how slaves behave in the same manner. The situation is magnified when the slaves are new to the lifestyle. A slave typically enter this way of life with a host of beliefs from the traditional lifestyle.

Being a multiple slave owner, it is easy to witness the paradox that slaves live under. Ask any slave if she wants to be trained and utilized based upon her as an individual and One will receive a “Yes”. Yet, while wanting to be appreciated for her individuality, she wants to have equal treatment from her Master. She feels that she is entitled to the same attention from her Master the other(s) receive. This is something that a slave needs to overcome if she is to last in the lifestyle.

The central concept of our lifestyle is the total exchange of power. This is what separates this from a traditional relationship-where the power lies. I have seen too many slaves trying to control by getting upset when she disagrees with her Masters focus. The reality is that a Master is free to interact with His slaves however He sees fit. If He prefers to give one special treatment, then that is how it is to be. A slave’s position is to accept her Master’s choice while abiding by them. Ranting and raving about how she is treated when compared to others is showing a lack of gratitude.

A slave’s growth is what increases her value to her Master. Anyone who continues to complain about her treatment is not growing. Instead, she is creating headaches for her Master. A Master makes decisions based upon a variety of issues. Often, it is not a slave’s business to know His reasoning. Again, her position is to be prepared to obey her Master whenever He wishes to interact with her. This is how a slave will increase her value.

Being an exceptional slave entails maturing into the role. Many feel that submission is enough. It usually only begins to scratch the surface. A slave truly needs to understand what total obedience means. The Master may only pay her periodic attention. If that is how He chooses to operate, that is how she will live. Attempting to sabotage her Master’s relationship with other slaves is an inexcusable act. It ranks up there with treason. For Me, this is an act which qualifies for automatic release. There is no point in dealing with a manipulative slave. This act shows her lack of willingness to cede the power of the relationship. Trust is instantly broken with this single act.

A Master provides His slave(s) with the necessities of life. After that, anything He chooses to give her is out of His benevolence. For those who have an issue with this, it might be time to re-evaluate one’s decision to be a slave. Perhaps one is better suited to pursue another lifestyle. Being a slave involves a level of submission that few can truly attain.

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