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Archive for March, 2009

When we look at BDSM and some of the things it can stand for, we mention wax play, spankings, bondage, oral sex and sex in general to name just a few parts of it. As I am a Master I tend to look at things from a Masters point of view and while most of what I say is relevant for both Masters and Mistresses there are obviously one basic differences, one is Male and one is Female, that said as far as the BDSM world is that is the only real difference.

When we talk of bondage, this is something that can be applied to both male and female subs and slaves, the same as nipple clamps can be used on both, and tying tits on a female slave may be something you find exciting, for a Mistress tying and binding a cock or balls can have the same desired effect.
The same is true for wax play, it is something that has no gender, it is a universal play that can be enjoyed by all involved regardless of the gender or dynamic of the relationship. In fact when looked at properly there are very few things enjoyed in the BDSM lifestyle that is gender specific,

With that said there seems to be just one thing that ALL in BDSM agree on, this is a lifestyle and it is something that is not a one size fits all life, it is something that each tailor to suit their needs and desires, that is why it is a growing lifestyle, its main aim is to enjoy and have fun with it

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Floating candle
Image via Wikipedia

I have posted about wax play before but have decided to add more to it, as it is one of the most erotic forms of sensual play I have known.

The basics of wax play are relatively simple, a candle ( I have found the cheap white ones best for a number of reasons, mainly as they burn cooler and are unperfumed so less chance of an allergic reaction to them ) and a body, simple really. There are a few tips I can give you, making sure the part of the body you are going to play with is relatively hair free makes the cleaning up easier, if that is not possible, a little petroleum jelly helps when applied before hand. You can add to the play by running an ice cube over the skin either before or after the wax, this gives both a hot and cold sensation to the slave and heightens the sensitivity of the skin.

The main thing with wax play is safety and enjoyment, be aware of what you are doing at all times, listen to your sub or slave and make sure she is happy with what is happening and finally enjoy

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As I have said so many times, there are many things that add together to make up the BDSM lifestyle and what it means to you as a person, that also goes for those who engage in it a step further, in the D/s and M/s relationships.

There are many types of these relationships, myself personally I am a poly Master, that is I own a couple of slaves, their service to me is I wish it to be, it might be as a house slave or as a sex slave or it might be a mix of the two, the point is, it is what I want and they know I am poly when submitting to me.
I have the options open to me to share my slaves if I wish to, be it with others in this life or having them play together to please me, although it does help if the slaves are bi sexual and get on with each other if I want them to play together but again that is something I decide upon in the end.

When a poly Master lets others play with those He owns it is not the slaves choice, however most Masters will lay down a few guide lines before the scene and be present through out to ensure that the slave is ok and not in distress, again whether he actually joins in is up to him, many times I prefer to watch at first so I can be alert to what is happening especially if she is new or these are people I know but have never had join us before I then have my slave please me afterwards and I have found that they are usually more than happy as this then brings them back to familiar ground and helps them to realise I am pleased with them and what has happened during the scene

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In BDSM, there is no place off limits * obviously this is something you have talked about and agreed on prior to the scene or during the process of submission* Most Doms and Masters like to show thier property off, they like to share with others, be it with others in their poly family or with other friends within the lifestyle, however, that said, most of those I know have always said that the anus is off limits to everyone but them, this is the ‘Forbidden Hole’ the one that is used by the Dom or Master only. Now why this is I really have no idea, it might be because anal sex was something frowned upon up until 10/15 years ago, it was alwas considered ‘perverted’ and not something ‘normal’ people did, how wrong they were !

Anal sex is something enjoyed by most in this life and in the vanilla as well, it is one more step to total submission by a sub or slave when they open all thier body for their Owner to take, to own and make it their own. It could be said that to take it a step further is to then go ass to mouth but that is up to the people involved as it is not something everyone can do.

Anal sex brings another aspect of pleasure into the BDSM life style, just think, how erotic is it to fuck an ass that you have made warm by spanking or paddling ? To have a sub or slave tied with her ass in the air waiting for you to decide what you are going to do, or even if you place a butt plug in while you pound her pussy, an ass hook for added fun, the posibilities are endless and the ass is no longer the forbidden hole to you.

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When people think of BDSM one of the first things they think of is spankings and bondage, and that is true for about 90% of those in this lifestyle, however we are still normal people, and we, like everyone else enjoy a laugh and a bit of fun, and if we can inject that into things we do relating to this life then all the more fun can be had.

That said I have brought together a light hearted post on floggers and paddles, don’t get me wrong, they can still deliver the desired effect but with a smile on the Dom or Masters face while He is paddling an ass with a flogger made of leather flowers ! All of the things I have collected for you can be found at the following sites, take a look, they have some wonderful products for your enjoyment

http://www.edenfantasys.com
http://www.rosybottom.com

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Much in this way of life is said about a sub or slave serving her Dom/Master, that it is His pleasure that matters, no matter what the task is it is His satisfaction that is important be it fetching Him a drink or during a scene, what He wishes is what is important and there is no geater time that this is evident than in oral sex.

Very few subs or slaves can honestly say they can orgasm from giving their Dom or Master oral sex yet they do this if it is asked of them, so why when they receive no pleasure themselves do they want to do it ? Simply put it is because it pleases their Dom or Master.

Submitting to another means you will do as they wish within the boundries of your relationship and this is more evident when it involves sex, as this is where even those who are not in a 24/7 relationship tend to submit, and the pleasure of the Owner is always the focus.

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All too often people think about BDSM and think of its serious side, the whippings, the tying, the owning of another be it for a scene or 24/7 but there is a lighter side of it, we, like any other group of people can tease and have a laugh, and we can also take a well known cartoon character and make it into a BDSM lover, hope you enjoy the selection I have found for you

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