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Posts Tagged ‘dominant’

Polygomy is a part of the BDSM community. Many need to be aware of this when looking into this way of life. I have encountered too many people who seem to thing that BDSM operates under the same premise as the traditional lifestyle. There, monagamy is the central characteristic in the relationship. It is one man and one woman (or two of a particular sex if it is a same sex situation). This characteristics can change in the BDSM world.

I must state that not all polygomists are into BDSM and, certainly, not all involved in BDSM are polygamists. Polygomy is a lifestlye choice that is separate from BDSM. It just so happens that many invovled in this way of life also choose the polygomy way also.

Many dominants prefer to have multiple submissives. This is especially true when one gets into the realm of M/s. It is not uncommon to find a Master have multiple slaves. Typically, they each will serve Him in a different manner. Some are brought in more for pleasure while others can tend to domestic affairs. I personally had slaves which assisted in my business matters. Each one was performed a different role for me.

Each slave is different. She is her own person with different wants and talents. A Master is mismanaging His resources if He fails to utilize her to the fullest of her abilities. Also, I found each slave likes different things. Obviously, some really enjoy pain while others abhor it. Having multiple slaves allows a Master to full His needs while not abusing one who really is not cut out for something. I feel it is better to engage in a particular fetish, as an example, with one who garners enjoyment out of the same activity. While it is within my right to push one, it could have negative consequences. This is a prime example of where multiple slaves compliment each other.

The key to succeeding in a poly relationship is to not compare yourself with another. This is something that extends past the BDSM and into the poly world. It is best to focus on whether you are getting what you need out of the interaction with your Master. The treatment others receive is of no concern of yours. This is something that is in direct contrast to the teaching of society. However, in the poly world, it is one of the main suggestions for success.

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Here are the top 10 fantasies that women have:

10. Sex With A Stranger: Women dream about the no strings attached sex with someone they meet on the street.

9. Working As A Prostitute Or Stripper: Show me the money. The fantasy of being picked up and used while receiving a c-note excites many women. Turning a man on by doing an exotic striptease is also high on the list.

8. Being Dominated By A Man: The female instinct to be dominated at the most animalistic level runs in high gear in her fantasy. She wants a man to take control her and use her.

7. Being Filmed: The desire to be admired while performing is exciting to many.

6. Fantasies Involving Romantic Sex: The moonlit beach with a handsome man; sex in front of the fire at a ski lodge-private cabana of course.

5. Group Sex: many different variations are thought about. Commonly women fantasize about mmf or mff. A few take it to the gangbang level.

4. Something You’ve Never Tried Before: a lot of women are in stall relationships and havent tried anything wild. This is something they dream about.

3. Sex with Another Woman: Most women wonder what it is like to be with another woman. This plays out deeper in their fantasies.

2. Sex with a Man Other Than Your Partner: She thinks about your buddies and her co-workers too. Famous people are also a common fantasy. Ever hear of George Clooney?

1. Fantasizing About Your Current Partner: The female species is a loyal bunch when with someone they care for. She will be thinking of you when you arent there.

You will also enjoy 10 Mistakes Men Make In Bed, 10 Tips For Attending A Sex Party, Top 10 Female Fantasies, and Top 10 Lesbian Fantasies.

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There are many payoffs to being sexually dominant. The world is crying for people to step up and take control. The list of submissives needing someone to use them is endless. Why do people shun from something that is so wonderful? Get involved in this lifestyle and watch all that changes.

Perhaps spelling out the benfits of sexual dominance will help this:

1. You will get laid more often:

People in this lifestyle tend to have a very high sex drive. No longer will you have to deal with the “not tonight honey, I am tired. You will have the control, something the other is more than happy to give you. A submissive wants to be used in every way possible. You will be like a kid in a candy shop. And you will be the envy of all your friends. All sex all the time.

2. You will get laid by more people:

Estimates are that the number of submissives versus doms is somewhere around 20 to 1. Do you understand what these statistics mean? There are people dying for you to take them. Why mess with all the other guys in the “vanilla” world.

3. Plain sex is boring:

Sex is suppose to be exciting, invigorating, and orgasmic. Are you tired of the missionary position every other Thursday? This lifestyle allows for the full exploration of human sexuality. You can find someone to do whatever you want. There are lovers of every type of fetish. Pull out the rope, floggers, and whips to increase pleasure for both of you.

4. Your relationship will reach a very deep emotional level:

Submissive people yearn to serve. They want to be used for the pleasure of another. Being treated sexually like an object is stimulating to these people. At the same time, the desire to serve comes from deep within oneself. When you fulfill that deep yearning, you find that the connection that the two of you have is beyond words. It is extremely deep-deeper then most anything you experienced.

Society teaches that we should not be dominant. It trains people to go against their true nature. When the dominant traits are removed, the ones who also suffer are the submissive types. Their desires can only be met by interacting with a dominant person. It is time for all to step up and take control.

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What is your favorite toy? This is a commonly asked question on most sex related forums. Of course, the answers one receives vary based upon the nature of the forum. Those that are sex only will find things such as vibrators, bullets. eggs, and dildoes. If the site leans more towards the BDSM world, W/we hear paddles, floggers, or bamboo. What is preferred also differs depending if it is a Master or Dom replying as opposed to a sub/slave.

Personally, My favorite accessory is a riding bat. This is a simple device that is used by those who ride horse. The animal is struck by the rider with this tool to get it to move at a faster pace. In essence, this is how the rider speeds the horse up.

For those unfamilar, it is similar to a riding crop. The difference is that the end has a tongue. This is the part of the tool which slaps the animal. The length of the device can be 18″ to about 30″. For me, I use both a 24″ and 18″ bat. The 24″ gives a nice slap on the back and ass. At the same time, the 18″ is ideal for nipple torture or slapping of the pussy. I find the shorter length offers more control while pinpointing my strikes.

These devices enhance the sexual experience. It is amazing how many women like the slap of the bat against their skin. Done proplerly, this will not cause pain, but rather, awaken the sensation within the body. The stinging will be momentarily heightening her pleasures. I like to hit her repeatedly for a count of five which will give her maximum pleasure without reaching the level of pain.

A word about nipple torture, my experience is that women will either love this or hate it. Even some pain sluts that I have owned find this to be too much. This is a personal matter individual to the person. Test it on her but back off is she doesnt like it. I have yet to find one who “learned” to like it. She either does or does not.

At the end of the day, I believe that you cannot beat the flexibility and uses of a riding bat. It is a simple device available at most stores where equine supplies are sold. Also, one can become adept at it in a short period of time. Finally, the amount of force used on impact make it the ideal device when dealing with one who is pain averse to the one who loves pain. Both can be satisfied with the same accessory.

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This is not intended to appeal to those who are interested in abusing women. Those who read my works know that I respect this lifestyle and am fully committed to making it better. I believe safety is of the utmost importance. However, for those who are serious, this can be the answer to O/one’s dreams.

This is a lifestyle where submissives outnumber dominants by an estimation of 20 to 1.

That tells me there are a lot of women who are seeking qualified people to control them (I always speak from the male perspective). Also, I know there are a lot of terrific guys out there who have a dominant streak to them yet have a tough time getting into a relationship. They are continually competing against all those with more money, better looks, and higher esteem. In the traditional world, the breakdown is almost 50/50. In this lifestyle, it is 5/95. One’s odds increase substantially.

I wrote “An Owned Life” with the intention of explaining the basics of this lifestyle. My hopes are that we attract some quality people with a dominant side to them who are willing to learn what it takes to be a good Master. The world has enough abusers and jugheads. It would be nice to see some of these people enter into this way of life.

Have you noticed that you have a dominant side to you while have the willingness to learn? If you do, take a look at this way of life. It has the ability to make all your dreams come true.

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