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Posts Tagged ‘healthy’

There is a major difference between playing during a scene and true degradation. Many enjoy the process of being put down, especially during sexual activities. This is fairly common among male subs. However, this is something that is more play than a realistic view of that person. A true Master will engage in this behavior during the scene while leaving it aside at other times in the relationship.

Anyone who continually uses degradation towards a slave shows that He lacks self-confidence for Himself. This is an indication that a slave might want to be alert. As mentioned in other posts, a true Master wants to increase a slave’s self worth. This is a basis for increasing her value. Pretenders do not have that mindset. They operate out of fear. Thus, one of the ways to control is to put another down. It is the classic “making myself seem better by putting another down”. It is a sure sign of insecurities within that person.

A slave is property of her Master. Let me ask: would someone continually degrade his new car? Most likely not. He will do all He can to show His affection for the vehicle. The same can be true of a slave. A true Master will do all He can to build her up and help her grow. He is concerned with her forward progress. Continually degrading someone removes the self confidence to be able to do that. It inhibits one’s progress while giving the “Master” a false sense of security. In reality, the One is really transposing His insecurities upon His slave.

Do you find that your insecurities are growing while dealing with this person? If so, be attentive to what they are telling you. Pretenders seek out one’s weaknesses while looking to exploit them. A true Master tries to help a slave overcome her shortcomings. Instead of degrading, He will be understanding and uplifting. This is the major difference.

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Punishments are a part of the Master/slave relationship. One of the important qualities that a Master seeks to instill in His slave is discipline. Part of this is punishment. However, punishments are consequences for actions taken (or not taken). They are administered in a judicious manner. Anyone who quickly goes into punishment mode is someone that one should question.

The foundation of the a slave’s servitude is obedience. She is to obey that which her Master sets out for her. He is the One who leads the relationship. Disobedience is the most valid reason for punishment. Anytime a slave willing disobeys her Master, she is choosing the path to punishment. This is how responsible Masters handle the situation.

Fakes take a different approach. To begin with, they use physical punishment as the only form of punishment. Again, those of us who are in the lifestyle know this can be an effective method. Anyone who has dealt with a slave who loves pain knows the futility in this. Therefore, we use other means to punish as opposed to beatings. Withholding serves as a better method for altering behavior.

When one finds herself repeatedly punished might want to question the validity of the person she is dealing with. There is something that Masters have learned; slaves are human. They will make mistakes. This is a fact of ownership and any Master who expects mistakes to be eliminated is not being realistic. Anyone who continually punishes for the most minor of mistakes is someone who belongs in another lifestyle.

Disobedience is grounds for punishment. An honest mistake on the part of a slave is not an indication that she is disobedient. True Masters will help a slave understand where she went wrong so that she can do better in the future. Also, He will look at the choice He made to determine if He needs to make some changes. Perhaps He assigned a task to the slave which was beyond her capability. Failure to complete it is not the slave’s fault in this situation but the Masters. Of course, repeatedly making the same mistake shows a failure to learn on the slave’s behalf which usually will entail some form of punishment.

So be leery of someone who is continually punishing. Anyone who uses this as the primary tool for modeling behavior is not real. They are just an abuser operating under the guise of a Master. This is a person one will want to avoid at all costs.

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