Posts Tagged ‘picture’

more great jokes and pictures at http://www.adultworldlyideas.blogspot.com/

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Personally I know nothing about sex because I have always been married.”
-Zsa Zsa Gabor

“The difference between pornography and erotica is lighting.”
-Gloria Leonard

“There’s no shortage of pussy- it’s just the delivery system that’s messed up.”
-Dr. Roy V. Schenk

“It’s all this cold-hearted fucking that is death and idiocy.”
-D.H. Lawrence

“He who asks is a fool for 5 minutes, but he who does not remains a fool forever.”
-Chinese Proverb

“It is not true that sex degrades women… if it is any good.”
-Alan Partridge

“Some mornings, it’s just not worth chewing through the leather straps.”
-Emo Phillips

“The penis mightier than the sword.”
-Mark Twain

“Sex is dirty only if it’s done right.”
-Woody Allen

“Sex-appeal is the keynote of our whole civilization.”
-Henri Bergson

“No sex is better than bad sex.”
-Germaine Greer

“My husband’s German. Every night I get dressed up as Poland and he invades me.”
-Bette Midler

“Give a man free hands, and you’ll know where to find them.”
-Mae West

“The art of life lies in taking pleasures as they pass, and the keenest pleasures are not intellectual, nor are they always moral.”

“Graze on my lips; and if those hills be dry, stray lower, where the pleasant fountains lie.”
-William Shakespeare

“It’s the good girls that keep the diaries; the bad girls never have the time.”
-Tallulah Bankhead

“Give me chastity and continence- but not yet.”
-Saint Augustine

“Whoever named it necking was a poor judge of anatomy.”
-Groucho Marx

“Sex is one of the nine reasons for reincarnation… The other eight are unimportant.”
-Henry Miller

“If sex is such a natural phenomenon, how come there are so many books on how to do it?”
-Bette Midler

“If God had intended us not to masturbate, He would have made our arms shorter.”
-George Carlin

“Love is not the dying moan of a distant violin- it’s the triumphant twang of a bedspring.”
-S. J. Perelman

“It’s been so long since I made love, I can’t even remember who gets tied up.”
-Joan Rivers

“From the moment I was six I felt sexy. And let me tell you it was hell, sheer hell, waiting to do something about it.”
-Bette Davis

“Sex appeal is 50% what you’ve got and 50% what people think you’ve got.”
-Sophia Loren

“Cunnilingus is next to godliness.”
-Kali Nichta

“The web is a dominatrix. Every where I turn, I see little buttons ordering me to Submit.”

“I believe that sex is a beautiful thing between two people. Between five, it’s fantastic.”
-Woody Allen

“The brain is viewed as an appendage of the genital glands.”
-Carl Jung

“My brain is my second favorite organ.” -Woody Allen

“Apparently one can temporarily sterilize oneself by heating one’s organs in boiling water.”
-Annonymous British Teenager

“Some things are better than sex, some things are worse, but there’s nothing exactly like it.”
-W. C. Fields

“No one has ever died from an overdose of pornography.”
-J. Money and P. Tucker

“It’ll be a sad day for sexual liberation when the pornography addict has to settle for the real thing.”
-Brendan Francis

“A man must be potent and orgasmic to ensure the future of the race. A woman only needs to be available.”
-Masters and Johnson

“Healthy, lusty sex is wonderful.”
-John Wayne

“I have brains and a uterus, and I use both.”
-Pat Schroeder

“Sexual intercourse is kicking death in the ass while singing.”
-Charles Bukowski

“Censorship reflects society’s lack of confidence in itself.”
-Potter Stewart

“It is better to be unfaithful than to be faithful without wanting to be.”
-Brigitte Bardot

“An erection at will is the moral equivalent of a valid credit card.”
-Alex comfort

“Sex is emotion in motion.”
-Mae West

“I consider sex a misdemeanor, the more I miss, de meaner I get.”
-Mae West

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When asked to go fishing together, it seems that both have different ideas as to what is going to happen,

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