Posts Tagged ‘punishment’

Humiliation is one part of BDSM that many do not understand, they cannot work out how a sub/slave can actually like to be spoken to in a derogitory manner, how they can grow in a way to accept what is being said or done to them and not let it affect them either mentaly or physically, yet this is one part that if done right can leave the sub/slave with the deepest feeling of submission, she acknowledges this as the final step in her total submission to her Master/Dom.
There are many ways to humiliate and to demean a person, some expamples of which follow, but for more tips and advice please click here and a more indepth post on this wonderful act can be found



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I recently was reading some posting on a particular website which discussed how different slaves are treated.  There were some who believed that all slaves are to be treated the same; others who felt that they need to be treated as individuals.  It was a lively discussion which went back and forth.  It is interesting to notice the logic people seem to use when making their arguments.

My experience leads me to believe that a slave needs to be treated as an individual.  This seems contrary to many opinions that are out there.  Unfortunately, as with a great many apects of this lifestyle, common sense goes out the window.  People seem to get into theory more than practicle experience.

Those who have multiple children will understand this perfectly.  Owning multiple slaves is like having multiple kids.  Each has their own personalities and interests.  Depending on the age of each child, a parent will give more or less latitude based upon that age.  A child is not treated the same at 14 as he or she is at 7.  There are different responsibilities each is able to handle.  Certain things work with one child which does not work with the other.  For one child a “C” in school may be the best that one can do.  For the other, a “B” maybe a shortcoming.  Each is treated differently based upon their capabilities.

With slaves, each is capable of different things.  Lets use sex as an example.  Some can do some amazing things in the bedroom.  Their bodies are flexible allowing for a variety of position which another might not be able to attain.  Also, there are different likes which makes it more interesting.  While a slave will adhere to her Masters wishes to allow anal, it is not as enjoyable as doing it with someone who really loves sex that way.  The difference in a slaves desires makes for a different experience.

Pain is another area which exemplifies this.  Some truly love the sensation of leather or other objects against their body.  Again, while a slave’s place is to allow her Master to do whatever He desires, his enjoyment is lessened if it is not something that she truly loves.  She will go along yet will not be as into it as someone who truly loves the pain.  Another difference which will alter a Master’s experience with it.

Experience is also something that dictates a varying of treatment.  Someone who was with a Master for 15 years has a certain rapport with that One as opposed to someone new.  They will know each others behaviors and attitudes.  This will allow for more to be unspoken.  With the new one, everything has to be spelled out.  Trust, a basic component of this lifestyle, is built over time.  The new one needs to earn it just like the older one did.

Managing slaves using the same approach is no more effective than managing people in the work place with this same method.  Each is an individual with different responses to different situations.  Expecting the same out of each is impossible since no two people will ever be at the same place at the same time.  People are individuals, thus necessitating the need to be treated as such.

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This is a subject I have discussed in the past yet felt compelled to revisit it.  Recent interaction with new people leads me to write about this again.  It seems to be an area of tremendous confusion with both Masters and slaves.  Clarification is needed to prevent senseless abuse.

Many believe that if a slave fails to complete a particular task, that a punishment is warranted.  My belief is that this is not necessarily true.  It is best to uncover why the activity wasnt completed as desired.  To start, is it something that the slave could accomplish?  Does she has the ability to do what is asked of her?  Secondly, what was the reason for the failure?  Was she being disobedient or was it because of a mistake on her part?  This last point is crucial.  Determining her motivation is what determines the needs for punishment or not.

Punishment is warranted in any situation where a slave is disobedient.  If she is given a task and decides not to do it, all bets are off.  She deserves whatever punishment her Master sees fit.  Her main objective is obedience.  Failure to do so is grounds for an “attitude adjustment”.

Mistakes are a totally different story.  I have met slaves who are routinely disciplined every time they make a mistake.  Their Masters feel they are correcting a situation.  To me this is amateurish.  Any Master who punishes consistently for mistakes is an abuser.  He is not interested in the growth of the slave.  Rather, His motivation is the feeling derived from having the power to punish.  Typically, this is in the form of physical discipline.

There is not a person on the planet who lives error free.  Everyone messes up.  The advantage is that mistakes are often our best teachers.  That is what helps a slave tremendously.  Each time she makes a mistake, that is an opportunity to learn.  Utilize these moments for education rather then discipline.  Of course, if the same mistake is made repeatedly, that might be a sign that it is time to “get her attention”.  Failure to learn a lesson shows a lack of focus.

Be sure to distinguish between a mistake and a slave being disobedient.  A slave’s growth can be stunted if a Master misses this crucial distinction.

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Punishments are a part of the Master/slave relationship. One of the important qualities that a Master seeks to instill in His slave is discipline. Part of this is punishment. However, punishments are consequences for actions taken (or not taken). They are administered in a judicious manner. Anyone who quickly goes into punishment mode is someone that one should question.

The foundation of the a slave’s servitude is obedience. She is to obey that which her Master sets out for her. He is the One who leads the relationship. Disobedience is the most valid reason for punishment. Anytime a slave willing disobeys her Master, she is choosing the path to punishment. This is how responsible Masters handle the situation.

Fakes take a different approach. To begin with, they use physical punishment as the only form of punishment. Again, those of us who are in the lifestyle know this can be an effective method. Anyone who has dealt with a slave who loves pain knows the futility in this. Therefore, we use other means to punish as opposed to beatings. Withholding serves as a better method for altering behavior.

When one finds herself repeatedly punished might want to question the validity of the person she is dealing with. There is something that Masters have learned; slaves are human. They will make mistakes. This is a fact of ownership and any Master who expects mistakes to be eliminated is not being realistic. Anyone who continually punishes for the most minor of mistakes is someone who belongs in another lifestyle.

Disobedience is grounds for punishment. An honest mistake on the part of a slave is not an indication that she is disobedient. True Masters will help a slave understand where she went wrong so that she can do better in the future. Also, He will look at the choice He made to determine if He needs to make some changes. Perhaps He assigned a task to the slave which was beyond her capability. Failure to complete it is not the slave’s fault in this situation but the Masters. Of course, repeatedly making the same mistake shows a failure to learn on the slave’s behalf which usually will entail some form of punishment.

So be leery of someone who is continually punishing. Anyone who uses this as the primary tool for modeling behavior is not real. They are just an abuser operating under the guise of a Master. This is a person one will want to avoid at all costs.

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