Posts Tagged ‘sub’

Having touched briefly on wax play, I have decided to revisit this particular activity in the hope to clear up some misconceptions that judging by the emails I have received some people seem to have.
Wax play is NOT about hurting your sub or slave and it is NOT about covering her or his entire body in wax, and it most defiantly is NOT about trying to burn them, it is about erotic foreplay, it is another dimension added to enhance the submission and trust between the Master or Dom and those He/She owns.
When done right, the dripping of wax on a persons body should not actually ‘burn’ them, it will heighten the sense of her body, it will bring attention to that particular area of her body, her skin will feel warm/hot and her mind will focus on the pleasure she is feeling, cooling that area with an ice cube either before or after then the feelings will intensify.
There are many articles describing wax play and its benefits and also the things to watch out for, if you are new to this type of play then I suggest starting on the hand or feet, these areas tend to be ‘tougher’ and therefore less likely to be burnt but at the same time they will allow practice so that you both are comfortable to move forward to another part of the body. The face is an area to avoid until you are both well practiced.
As with all things associated with BDSM and its different forms of play, take care to watch your sub/slave so you know instantly if she is experiencing any discomfort and react accordingly so this is a pleasurable experience for you both, and most of all have fun


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Having touched on this subject before, and recieving lots of mail regarind it I have decided to add an update to this subject for your enjoyment * and mine *

BDSM is a lifestyle that more and more are enjoying, whether they live it 24/7 or just once a month when they meet with someone to partake in a scene or even if they dabble in it within their normal everyday sexual or daily life. – to be honest there are thousands of people who add a bit of this life into thier sex lives daily and they really are unaware of it !

One of my favorite parts of BDSM is bondage, * note I said one * and this can add to other parts of this life in so many different ways, just think, a bound sub/slave is at your mercy, you control the play and how much or how little pleasure that person recieves, be it a male or female, they are at your mercy, this in itself takes an infinate amount of trust but once you have that total trust the rewards are endless for all concerned.

I personally love to bind my slaves tits, this is something that heightens their sensitivity, so the slightest flick of a crop or paddle adds that bit more bite, add some clothes pegs to her nipples or the fleshy underside of the breast and for the more experienced a ‘zipper’ effect and the initial pain felt is soon outweughed by the pleasure recieved

Remember always be aware of the person you are with, and watch for their body language, some do not take to certain things as well as others so slowly introducing different things into your playtime is often the best way, afer all this is supposed to be fun for ALL concerned


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As BDSM is becoming more and more noticed in the ‘vanilla’ world you will find more and more cartoons depicting this way of life, now I do not say they are accurate in all they show but some of them are really funny, and they are using more and more of the more well known cartoons.

I have compiled a few for your enjoyment, I hope you like then as much as I did

A Helping Hand From Jerry

A Helping Hand From Jerry

cartoon femdom

cartoon femdom

zena is having fun

zena is having fun


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After recieving a few requests I am going to touch on the subject of FEMDOM briefly once more, for more information, I recommend reading previously posted articles and pictures which can be found on here.

Femdom is just a small part of the BDSM life, but as with all things in this life it makes an important part for those who choose to live this way, it is not something for all, but there are many men and women who love to be dominated by a female, and there are many women ( Dommes ) who have the ability to fulfill this role.

As with male Doms and Masters there is a lot of responsibility for these Mistresses, their role in this life is the same as that of the mans, there is no sexual discrimination involved, the basic ‘rules’ are the same and the subs or slaves needs as much care and nurturing as they would if they were owned by a man.

The sexual side of things are again within reason the same, there is little or no difference in how a sub or slave serves the One who owns them, and in todays world more and more men are seeking the release from high pressure jobs and demanding routines by submitting to someone they trust and respect, and for hetrosexual men that one is a Mistress or Domme.

As with all things in this life, it is not about brute strength,force or pyhsical power, even the smallest woman can be a Mistress to a 6ft man and get him to submit to her desires, it is about more than that and no one should feel belittled by submitting to a woman. If the parties involved are happy then that is all that matters in the end

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We have touched on the humiliation aspect of BDSM, how some really enjoy this and as long as steps are taken to ensure the safety * mental more than physical * then it can be an enriching experience for those involved.

Another way to humiliate a sub/slave is to write on thm, slogans such as ‘cum slut’ and ‘whore for use’ really do demean a slave, especially if it is seen by more than her Master, lipstick is one way to write on them, it removes easily for when the scene is over, or for a more perminant reminder a perminant marker is harder to remove, and placing the writing where she cannot reach it * on her back and ass for example * makes it even harder. The words used can be general sexual terms or more personal, however you wish to write on your property it can be something that take the humiliation one step further.


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The collar in BDSM means so many things, it can be a sign of ownership * although I must point out that not every Master or Dom will collar their property, some do not believe in this ceremony*, it can be a leash for those who like to lead their property around, it can be the signal that a scene is going to unfold, especially if it is in a public munch setting and it can be used as a ‘holding’ point for chains,ropes or leashes.

There are so many different types of collars on the market I am not even going to try to list them all, they range from steel ones which cannot be removed to dog collars, but they all in essence do the same job, they all provide the use they are intended for.

Whether you believe in collaring your property or not, in my opinion it is one of those ‘must haves’ for the toy box, it has so many uses. Points to remember though, do not have the collar too tight, most slaves and subs do not look good with blue faces, some are allergic to certain materials, make sure the sub/slave is not allergic to the collar and if you pull on it, try not to jerk it too hard, whiplash can occur if you are too rough and suddenly jerk hard on the collar, Enjoy


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One aspect of BDSM is the clothing, how humiliation it can be for a sub/slave to be dressed as a whore and made to go out in public dressed like that, or to make a male sub/slave dress as a woman and go and do the shopping etc, this is one way that clothing is effective in BDSM, another way is fetish wear.

To some the wearing of rubber, latex,corsets,no underwear, harnesses etc are as much a part of their style of BDSM as anal sex or spankings are to others, the diversity and wide range of differences are very noticable in BDSM yet they all seem to mix well together.

No matter what your preference is, enjoy your life, make it work for you all and you will find it is something many dream of but few achieve


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This is one aspect of BDSM that I enjoy, I am a poly Master and I own a couple of slaves, each of them have a different role to play in my life, and I treat them differently, remember my previous post about one size not fitting all, well this is an example of this thinking. Now my slaves in theory ‘share’ me, that is something they have no say in, it is my decision who I talk to, who I interact with, who indeed I sleep with, that is my choice and they respect that, it is also my desicion who they engage in sex with, whether it is male or female.

I hear many new ones saying,” Oh no i couldn’t do that ” what they fail to realise is it is not their choice, and whilst I will listen to their views and worries, ultimatly it is my decision and unless there is something that will truely harm them then I will do as I wish with them, forgive me if I sound arrogant, but the Dom or Master is the dominating force in this relationship and as such should not be dictated to by those he owns.

Most subs and slaves fear this act of sharing as they are not used to it, it is a fear and not a hardcore limit, and as a Master it is my job to push their limits,break their fears, and this is one way that I can do this, however I will say that I am always present when my slaves are being used by others, whether I am engaged in the sex or not, this way I can watch them closely, no one will know your property as you do and this is a safety measure for all involved,

BDSM is fun, the freedom of the sexual experiences is second to none, enjoy all it can bring you


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What is the one major thing that comes to mind when you start to either ‘scene’ or engage in sex with someone ? Pleasure,release,that feel good factor ? Well yes all of these and more, and in the BDSM or M/s D/s encounters the pleasure of the Dominant is what is the sub or slaves main priority, and there is no sex act that allows this as much as oral sex. During oral sex, while the person giving it might get turned on it is very rare they will encounter an orgasm, however the one recieving it more often than not will unless they stop it before that point is reached, and this one act is a final submission, a final giving of control to the Master or Dom.

In a vanilla relationship, sex is about pleasure for both, in a BDSM the sub or slave has release only at the Master or Doms wish, they have no right to an orgasm, they have no say in whether they can cum, they are there for the pleasure of another and this is something that people cannot understand but it is something that those within this life live for, especially the subs and slaves, they wish for their owners to be happy and their pleasure comes second in that desire.

Oral sex is something that is almost all about the Master or Doms pleasure, it is an act that some subs or slaves hate and others adore, and if ass to mouth is added as well, this in itself is a humiliation for the sub slave * yes I know that some like this, I am talk about those whom I own in this instance * but no matter their feelings it is something they will do as it is their Masters wish, to some it ranks up there with anal sex, in the vanilla life it is something the ‘good girls’ do not do. There are many reason I live my life as I do, and the more you think about it the more reasons there are, sexual freedom is just one of them and to have someone whose main wish is my happiness is another.


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One thing I have noticed while living the BDSM life is the preferences of all Masters and Doms are vast and varied, this can range from how they contol their property, and I have written many articles on this, to their sexual preferences, whether they like the more hard core aspect of BDSM or the softer side, spanking or no spanking, as I have said many times, this is not a one size fits all lifestyle and this is evident the more you meet other people and se how they go about their lives within the BDSM realm.

One thing I have noticed, and lets face it, I am a man and therefore would notice this, is how people differ in how they like their subs or slaves to be kept with regard to their pussies. Some like smooth and shaved, waxed or even electrolosis have been known to be used, others like neatly trimmed and then others still like the hairy natural look * this is my preference*. This to me is yet one more way that BDSM allows us to live our lives and explore our sexual prefrences with out having to wonder what people will say.

No matter how you like your pussy, as long as you are both happy, then all I can say is enjoy and have fun, after all that is one of the reasons we live our lives this way.


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